OctPoWriMo #16 – Paradelle

Lying here to rest
Lying here to rest
Comfortably numb
Comfortably numb
Comfortably lying
To rest here, numb

Hoping forever
Hoping forever
Love will never end
Love will never end
Never, forever
Hoping love will end

Apathy in boredom, cycles
Apathy in boredom, cycles
Black holes of hope
Black holes of hope
Apathy in hope
Black holes; cycles of boredom

Black holes of love
Lying here and hoping
Forever numb
To never rest comfortably
Boredom cycles
Hope will end apathy

 

 

A very complicated challenge today… not sure about this at all!
octpowrimo

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Author: Al Lane

Writer, Poet, Daydreamer

40 thoughts on “OctPoWriMo #16 – Paradelle”

  1. Interesting and has the wee rodent inside my brain, running like a champ on that wheel…. I like it a lot

    1. I just read yours… you succeeded! The furrowed brow must have helped. As well as time to actually sit and think 🙂
      It’ll have to wait for another time for me!

          1. Well, I hate to argue with you–but the results are hardly “middling”; I bookmarked yours and Two Paise Poems both–because I needed examples to follow IF (BIG IF) I do the prompt. Feel better? 🙂

  2. Ok, I LOVE your poem.
    LOVE IT
    Coming from someone who struggled with mental illness a lot of her life, just know that… it made so much sense to me, in the way it didn’t make sense. If this makes sense at all 😉

    Thank you for giving it a go. You did a beautiful job!

  3. I think you’ve been very clever in attempting the challenge using minimal words to make the “combined” lines and the last “combined” verse easier to write. This style definitely requires a lot of planning and thought about the end result.. you almost need to write the poem backwards.

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